So much of our lives are spent online, particularly on social media whether it be on a social level, personal level, or more for purposes of engagement, growth and progression for people like myself. So much so we often find ourselves online multiple times per day for a one reason or another. Maybe to check our bank balance to see if we really could manage to grab that newly launched palette we’ve been eyeing up, or perhaps to check out the menu of the newest place to eat in town, possibly to even make medical appointments. Computers with online access are required for almost everything, more now than ever before. As a whole we are all reliant upon modern technology, probably a little too much. Could you imagine if suddenly the whole internet suffered a global crash?! The world would legit grind to an abrupt halt!
I feel fortunate to be part of what was probably the last generation to grow up enjoying a predominantly unplugged life where technology wasn’t anything like it is today. I didn’t get my first phone till I was around 12 or 13, even then is was the classic Nokia 3210 which had basic functionality at best, not to mention snake! So frustratingly addictive. I personally preferred numbers myself, although I’m pretty sure I’m the only one who actually remembers it.
Anyway, back to the topic.
Up until recently when I took to blogging, my social media presence was a barely there one at best. I had personal accounts on various platforms but for the most part they would see little to no activity, and that worked for me. I didn’t want to live my life on the internet.
Fast forward a year and a half and I’m now a blogger which is entirely online based and requires a lot of interaction on social media. With that are of course the pros and cons. You put yourself out there to be judged, and like it not a lot of people will do it, and that brings with it a degree of negativity. Sometimes a lot, depending how you are able to deal with it. Some of this is beyond our control unfortunately, but there are some measures we can put in place to help make way for a happier and more pleasant online environment.
I’ve discovered some key things I’ve found that work for me and they might for others too, so let’s share.
Detox
I realise this post is about how to make your online space a happier setting and a detox might seem to be defeating the objective of that, but hear me out. Putting your phone down, which is probably the device you most commonly spend your time online, away for periods of rest, or better yet even temporarily deleting social apps so not to be tempted to sneak on to see what cake Becky had from Peggy Porschen.
It’s so easy, a little too easy to become so engrossed in our online lives that we become somewhat disconnected from our real lives. Taking some time out to detox ourselves is one of the best things we can do. The time you set to do this is entirely down to yourself, but it’s healthy to take regular breaks from the weird and wonderful online world. It can completely alter our perspective and breed negativity in itself by spending too much time online.
Regular breaks are a must!! You feel so much more refreshed when you return.
Unfollow / Mute
Something we have a lot of control over to an extent is what we see on our timelines and feeds. For the most part it’s generally ok, but you do get an aspect of things filtering their way in that might not be of any interest or what you care to see. If you notice anyone posting a regular steam of content you don’t wish to see be sure to unfollow, or better yet mute and unfollow so that way they can’t creep in by people you do follow liking or sharing their posts.
Ignorance is most definitely bliss, if only it were as easy to shut out people and negativity in real life. We all have a right to choose to unfollow anyone we wish if they don’t fit into what we enjoy or want to see anymore. No guilt in it what so ever. Our own happiness and self-care is the main thing to focus on here.
Be Kind
This applies to all aspects of life, not just online. I do notice that people are far more willing to involve themselves in drama and this whole “calling out” culture than in real life. I guess it’s easier and safer to sit behind a device screen and spout off than if that person were actually in front of them.
I’m beginning to see more nasty comments and sly digs and I just don’t get it. Why not just nothing at all. From a young age we were all taught the whole “if you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all”. Of course everyone is entitled to an opinion and has freedom of speech, but there are also appropriate ways you can approach a situation if you feel compelled to do so. My overall philosophy is that if it doesn’t really concern you, keep yourself out of it. No speculating or assuming things either, absolutely no good can come from this!
We’re all going through our own battles that others know nothing about, whether they be big or small. Always be kind and if you can’t be kind just be quiet. It’s often worth considering how these actions might affect those it concerns and better yet, how you might like it if it were the other way around. Dare I say not a lot.
How do you manage online life? Do you feel you strike the right balance?
I have a more in-depth post on the importance of me time which ties in a little to this post by way of detoxing, you can find that post here.
41 Comments
These are great tips! It’s so important to have a detox, it’s so easy to get sucked into the online world of drama and being on your phone 24/7 that we forget the real world. I try not to get myself in any drama either, I don’t understand the point in engaging in all that negative energy when you can just be positive? Great post lovely! x
I love this post!
I need to take more time out of social media and have a detox, I find myself endlessly scrolling and wonder what I’m even doing half the time xx
Mel I feel this on a majorly emotional level! So well written and I couldn’t have put it better myself x
Hahaha, I had a 3310, and also got it around that age! It is so important to take a step back and live our lives offline!
I’ve literally abandoned my social media recently and i feel so good for it. i do feel super guilty too though for letting my blog accounts slide!
Unfollowing and muting can definitely help! x
http://www.ofbeautyandnothingness.co.uk
Love this post! I always unfollow negative people! x
I tend to find that it’s hard to stay away from social media with everything now so I’ve changed it to suit me. I unfollow those who I don’t interact with, seek positivty from or just plain don’t like anymore. I don’t follow for follow people as much as that sometimes seems the go to thing. I keep control of what I want to be able to see and involve myself in and limit the negativity. I agree though, we all need a break from it every now and then even if it’s just a few days to get back to real life.
This post is so needed right now! There is such much agg and bitterness, it’s so sad to see, especially from grown women who should know better xx
I really struggle with not checking my phone – especially as part of my job is social media management! I’m trying to set a rule of no phone after 8.30pm…lets see how long I last!
Em x
https://happywiseowl.com/
I absolutely love this post! Such an important one.
Shauna | http://goddessguide.co.uk
To be honest I’m sick of people who tweet indirect digs at others on twitter amongst the rest. Don’t understand why people feel the need to cause drama and make others feel upset at all. Definitely agree that you should just use the mute button as then you don’t have to see it! x
YES!! Unfollowing and muting has to be the best thing ever! I love it! I think being poisitive and happy makes all the difference!
Erin || MakeErinOver
Could not agree more with all three of these points. Don’t follow people for the sake or it, don’t put up with negativity. Positivity is key!
Alys / alysgeorge.blogspot.co.uk
I loved this! I do worry about social media and how out of control it’s getting but this has given me hope.
Such a great post with really useful tips. It’s so important to try and not get to caught up in social media and to have a break when it gets too much! X
As much as I love the idea of a social media detox, I don’t think I’d be able to do it myself without having a breakdown! I’ve learnt to unfollow people if I’m not happy with them on my feeds though, and I’ve also muted any words I struggle to deal with.. 😇
Hi Mel, I love this post! I’m a writer and I’ve been growing my social media for 2 years. Now that I have more of a following, it’s been a challenge to keep up with it all, especially messages. Your advice is practical and helpful, thank you!
Loved reading this! I like social media but I try not to be on it too much. When someone gets too much for me, I usually just end up muting them xD
☼
Such good advice! It’s so easy to get caught up and get stuck in a rut! These tips are great 💕 xx
Good tips! It can be hard sometimes to balance the time I need to spend on social media if I want my blog to be successful and the rest of life.
Some great tips! Social media can be so, well just cruel and an unhappy place, but it is so easy to make it something you can enjoy!
http://beyondimagination12.blogspot.co.uk/
I totally agree with you about social medai! Oh man, I can’t imagine growing up with all of the current technology! It’s great to detox from time to time! I’ve done it and didn’t feel like I was out of the loop at all or needed to catch up! YES! The mute button is so useful! There’s so much I could scroll through before having to do other things. Thanks for sharing these tips!
exquisitely.me
I love this post & its come at the perfect time for me.
It takes a lot for me to unfollow someone but I am pretty found of the mute button haha x
I am not as active as I used to be on social media and I find it so relaxing. Like I do not post at the weekend and keep it to a minimum. IG stories when I do something interesting. I agree that unfollowing people that are negative really helps and being kind is essential! xx corinne
I do a social media detox once in a while. It really helps to disconnect from it. Especially facebook is a tad overwhelming to me sometimes.
I do enjoy the kindness of the blogging community a great amount. It’s such a supportive place 🙂
I need to do a better job of putting down my electronics. It is just too easy to get really involved in the online drama.
Lovely tips! I keep unfollowing people I no longer find inspiring and following new ones just to freshen my feed.
I also love spending less and less time scrolling 🙂
http://www.desiringsme.com/3-ways-increase-confidence/
Really great tips! Today I made the decision to remove Facebook from my phone. It was the one app that really got me down, so I’m trying to distance myself from it. I use it for messenger so am keeping it on my laptop at home, but I decided that I really didn’t need to spend my commute endlessly scrolling.
Tori | JustTheBeginning-x.com
Latest blog post: Where do I see myself in 5 years time?
Love this post! If everyone carried out these things, the social media world would be a much more pleasant place! Xxx
Being a college student with a blog I’m trying to constantly work on and elevate is tough. I took a break from social media for a couple of weeks leading up to my finals. It was definitely hard, but I was grateful.
I wish social media was a lot happier too! There’s too many people making digs at others rather than just focusing on their own lives. I don’t see it that often but hopefully it gets a bit better! x
These are really great tips to keep in mind when using social media! Most of the time, we get so caught up that we forget to take breaks. Even unfollowing that person we dislike helps sooo much!!
☼ cabin twenty-four
Loved reading this post & think it’s so well written. Personally I just step back from social media when it gets to much x
Great tips, I agree with being kind, there’s so much negativity and hurtful comments and it really is like people find security in being that way because they get to hide behind a screen. I think detoxing is a great way of resetting and always be kind.
Emma x
emmarollason.com
This is a great post! I’ve come to realise that it’s so important to make sure that you don’t feel sad or jealous when using social media. I’ve found that the twitter blogging community is so great at being positive, women (and men) should always support each other!
I definitely agree, social media should be a positive and inspirational place. I find taking a detox, even if it’s just for a day really helps to keep things in perspective. This is a great post, excellently written 💖 xx
Bexa | http://www.hellobexa.com
Yes to all of this! I’ve started going for walks – I’m generally listening to a book or podcast but I’m not checking my phone and I’m getting some exercise. I’ve also started crocheting in the evenings and resisting the urge to check my phone 20times. Definitely a good thing. Same with muting and unfollowing – I’ve unfollowed but forgot to mute – such a good shout! Need to do that in future. Being Kind is something to do online and offline. It’s so easy to get swept up in drama and gossip, it doesn’t do anyone any good. Onwards!
Honestly Aine
I need to unfollow quite a lot of people to be honest, it’s hard when some of the peolpe you want to unfollow on social media are friends in real life though!
Julia // The Sunday Mode
I always clear out my social media space every week and it is so refreshing. I need to try and get off of my phone more and go for a walk or read a book. I have been on it non-stop recently. Excellent post, written really well xxx
Rebecca-Marie x
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